ADULT STORIES


The Flatulent Ghost (3,100 words) is a comedy ghost story, told casually in the words of a taxi driver chatting to his fare.  The idea came to me when I read about people knowing a ghost was present because it grew cold, or they heard the rattling of chains, or they smelled a ghostly trace of roses.  I imagined a ghost which announced its presence by rattling the toilet seat, or pulling the chain, or smelling of.... well, you can read the title as well as I can.

Waiting for Breakfast (3,300 words) is a black comedy, centred on a weird family that settles in an old house and subsequently fails to register on society in any human way at all.  If I have written it correctly, then the fact that it is told from the viewpoint of one of the peculiar family should give it a cold, inhuman edge.

I don't often remember when and why I wrote any particular story, but this is an exception.  I am a teetotaller, but many years ago (it was at the 21st birthday party of a friend), I was plied with several glasses of whisky.  The result was a graceful collapse into the "whirling pits" and a deep sleep during which I dreamed I was writing a story.  When I woke up in the morning, bright and early with no trace of a hangover, I found I was able to write down the story word for word.  I called it Waiting for Breakfast partly because that title fits the grim parameters finally revealed in the story, and partly because I really was waiting to be fed.